I can't predict the future but i can feel what's com'in up

Yesterday night i went to meet Iyan . :) He then brighten up my day again with his smiles and silly jokes that never fail to me laugh ! I tell you ah , that boy is FOS but his jokes were good . Sweet right ? After booking out of army he made his way down to vivo to meet me for 2 hours and then off to meet his friends at Taman Jurong . Jauh sehy ! Monday i'll be returning to school ! CAN'T WAIT ! CAN'T WAIT ! Wanna see Dumplingzzzxoxo ! I miss her so much .
I tell you uh , i'm so fucking pissed with my internet connection okays ! Thanks to ever since my brother went to Thailand , PUCCI conn is gone la && now im using linksys which is a total bitch ! I can't believe this is happening to me , seriously . Now i'm using my mums computer and thank god her damn computer is working well but shes using a different connection . And of all the connection on the list asides from the locked ones? && supposedly i'm allowed to access my muum's connection , sadly i can't . Fucking hell anal i swear ! So then again , cigarettes helped me solve my problems . Not exactly but bits of it was solved . Since i couldn't use the computer for one whole day ????????? Instead of solving the internet problem , i took hours of nap therefore i can't sleep tonight till later on . Tomorrow i have tuition at Parkway . I dread going there . I hate that place ! I HATE IT , I HATE IT ! Due to personal reasons not only cos of THE EX but yeah . I HATE IT !

( Has Ms Adora started dating all over once again , for real ? ) - So quick !

Hmmph , i think i am . I think i'm falling inlove again . Now looking back at what the 9 months was to me it was nothing . Nothing compared to my 2yr 6mths and appearantly that ex of mine and i are still good friends and we keep contact everyday :) We still update one another about our status , we know each others dirrtyyy lil secrets . HAHA So yeah . Is Mr Right knocking on my door ? He seems like the whole package sorta thing . Compared to Q , he has much more of a character than Q does . He's what every girl wants in a guy . His looks , his character . He could easily spill a smile across my face . Any guy could have done it easily but there was only one that couldn't and stupid , like seriously STUPID of me to last with him for 9 months . Poor current girlfriend of his has to tolerate his torments . My foot , i'll fucking kill myself on the spot if he changes for her . Maybe if he does , its probably out of selfishness ! Y'know y'know what i mean ? Ahhh ... Anyways , starting from today i shall stop blogging about him anymore cos it's taking me no where but only arouses me with anger .. I should think about the friends and happy people whom have helped me throughout the harsh times for this one whole month .. MatBengz , you're not a rebound ..

( Later on )

I feel kinda sad for how i once treated Seth last time . But i mean , i warned him .. No strings attach and i wanted to use him to get rid of Nicholas . But he ended up falling for me and i falling for him too and he msg'd me today " Frankly speaking i like you too but i'm not ready and i think you deserve better .. " Well i don't understand this whole contradiction about guys not being ready and thinking i should find someone better . Like , why can't they be the better ones ? I mean , no matter how high/low my expectations are .. i'm sure bits of the men i am looking for has some missing qualities . Well , no one is perfect and i totally unerstood that statement . Cos i've seen it with my own eyes and i've accepted someone that way before . But it is what the lil things the person does to make the whole relationship perfect . Am i right ? Well , i'm not tryna be some hot topic here talking but its coming from my heart . Things i have once said are being repeated cause i really feel this way . I don't want no fairy tales in my life , this is reality and i'll be living it now and forever . But whatever that has happened has caused this heart of mine to suffer . Suffer in a way that , i see love as something not even words could describe but only ones action can express how much they love their other half . I've seen enough , i've cried enough , i 've fooled around enough , i've ... There's something in my life that i think i'm lacking of .. Mr Right , are you there ?

Tonight , i 'm silent .
How about you ?